Transboy Dom Jamie shares with us …
Escort agency representation is often difficult for trans, gender queer and non-binary persons to find within the SW industry and very important for us to change with our work. Paramour Collective prides itself on being a welcoming community for all peoples who want to provide sexual services.
March. 31st is international Transgender day of Visibility and we asked one of our collective members to share their experiences as a trans person within the world of Sex Work with us. Thank you Jamie for sharing your thoughts and words.
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In my observation, pro sex work activism focuses strongly on normalizing sex work as work.
This is an important focus—yes! sex work is work!
Equally important, however, is not to romanticize the erotic industry. This industry is a direct reflection of patriarchal, racist, sexist, cis, and heteronormative social structures. The primary target audience consists of overprivileged white cis men with highly normative expectations—both in terms of the service providers’ appearance and performance, as well as the services they request. Service providers who don’t fit into this norm often face explicit hostility and exclusion. So, on the one hand, I want to emphasize how exclusive this industry is on the consumer side for everyone who is not white, cis male, straight, and able-bodied. For example, women, queers, and people with disabilities are rarely considered as potential consumers of erotic services.
This lack of inclusivity is, for example, evident in the way BDSM studios are equipped. You’ll often find multiple types of chastity belts designed for penises, but none for other genitals. Likewise, playing with gender expression is almost exclusively marketed as feminization—there is no space for people who already perform femininity and want to explore their gender identity in other ways. Androgynous expressions or transgender identities are rarely, if ever, acknowledged. These are just a few obvious examples, but the issue runs much deeper. It is reflected in everything from how the erotic industry portrays itself in porn and advertisements on websites to the design of sex toys. The majority of the erotic industry reinforces rigid gender norms and cis-heteronormative definition of bodies and sex, making it difficult for anyone outside of the binary—or even those who want to explore beyond stereotypical roles—to find representation or access to services tailored to their needs.
A crucial aspect of consumer behavior is how people are socialized regarding their bodies and sexuality. If you grow up constantly judged through a patriarchal, racist, sexist, cis, and heteronormative lens, it can deeply impact how you experience and express your sexuality. Additionally, factors like the gender pay gap and unequal access to well-paying jobs can exclude marginalized people from purchasing erotic services altogether.
At the same time, the industry itself is not a level playing field. While being a marginalized sex worker can mean occupying a niche, it often comes at a high cost: fewer clients, lower rates, and significantly more labor. Additionally, it is incredibly difficult for marginalized, deviant bodies to establish themselves as anything other than what they are fetishized for. This makes it, for example, especially hard for a transmasculine person to be seen as a BDSM Dominus, because they are primarily booked for transfetishizing sexual services rather than for the BDSM competence and wide spectrum of techniques and practices they actually offer.
This is exactly why it is crucial to empower and structurally strengthen marginalized consumers. If we want real change, we need to create spaces where BIPoC queers, women, trans, disabled, and other marginalized people not only feel safe consuming erotic services but also have the economic and social means to do so. Without a shift in power and access, the industry will continue catering almost exclusively to those already in privileged positions.
sex work is work, no matter what! But it’s work in an industry that—like any other—is deeply normative and structured to primarily serve cis male desire.
I want more queer clients!
Follow Jamie on Instagram here: www.instagram.com/transboy_dom_jamie
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Photo Reference: Jamie Transboy_Dom Photographed by: Sean Paul Denny